white and sage green table set up

A bridal shower and a bachelorette party are both pre-wedding celebrations, but they have distinct purposes and differences in terms of their focus, activities, and guest lists.

We have you covered with our complete in-depth planning guides for both bridal showers and bachelorettes.

Here’s a breakdown of the key differences between the two:

white and sage green table set up

Bridal shower vs bachelorette

Bridal Shower:

  • Purpose: The primary purpose of a bridal shower is to “shower” the bride with gifts, well wishes, and advice for her upcoming marriage.
  • Guests: The guest list for a bridal shower typically includes close female friends, family members, and sometimes female relatives of the groom. It is a more inclusive event that may involve women of different age groups and generations.
  • Activities: Bridal showers often include activities and games that center around the bride. These activities can be interactive, trivia-based, or advice-sharing sessions. There is a focus on celebrating the bride and providing her with support and guidance.
  • Tone: Bridal showers tend to have a more relaxed and intimate atmosphere. They are often held during the day and can include a sit-down meal, afternoon tea, or brunch. The focus is on conversation, connection, and honoring the bride.

Bachelorette Party:

  • Purpose: The purpose of a bachelorette party is to celebrate the bride-to-be’s last days of being single and to have a fun and memorable night or weekend with her closest friends.
  • Guests: Bachelorette parties typically include the bride’s closest friends, usually the bridal party and other close female friends. It is more of a close-knit gathering, and the guest list is usually limited to a specific group of friends.
  • Activities: Bachelorette parties often involve a night out on the town, weekend getaways, or special activities such as spa days, karaoke, or dance classes. The focus is on enjoying memorable experiences together and having fun.
  • Tone: Bachelorette parties tend to have a more lively and party-oriented atmosphere. They often take place in the evening or night and can involve going to bars, and clubs, or engaging in activities that cater to the bride’s interests and preferences.

While there can be some overlap in terms of guests and activities, the main distinction lies in the purpose and overall tone of the events. Bridal showers focus on gift-giving, support, and advice for the bride, while bachelorette parties are centered around celebrating the bride’s upcoming marriage with a fun and memorable night or weekend with close friends.

sage and white table styling

Which one is right for you, bridal shower or bachelorette?

Deciding between a bridal shower and a bachelorette party ultimately depends on your personal preferences, the type of celebration you envision, and the dynamics of your relationships with friends and family. Here are some factors to consider when making a decision:

  1. Purpose: Think about what you value most in a pre-wedding celebration. If you appreciate the idea of receiving gifts, well wishes, and advice from a wider circle of female friends and family members, a bridal shower may be a good fit. On the other hand, if you prioritize having a fun-filled night or weekend with your closest friends and creating lasting memories, a bachelorette party might be more suitable.
  2. Guest List: Consider the people you would like to include in the celebration. If you have a close-knit group of friends or a specific set of bridesmaids who are instrumental in your life, a bachelorette party could provide an opportunity to bond and enjoy a more intimate gathering. If you want to involve a broader range of female friends, family members, or even colleagues, a bridal shower may be a better choice.
  3. Atmosphere and Activities: Reflect on the type of atmosphere and activities that appeal to you. If you prefer a relaxed and intimate setting, perhaps with a sit-down meal or afternoon tea, where you can engage in conversations and enjoy games focused on your journey to marriage, a bridal shower might be ideal. If you envision a livelier and more adventurous celebration, such as a night out on the town, a spa day, or a destination weekend, a bachelorette party could be more suited to your preferences.
  4. Time and Logistics: Consider the practical aspects, such as timing and logistics. Determine how much time and resources you and your friends are willing and able to dedicate to the event. If you have limited time or are planning a destination wedding, a bachelorette party may be more manageable. If you have more time and want to include a broader group of people, a bridal shower can be a flexible and inclusive option.
  5. Communication with Loved Ones: Discuss your thoughts and preferences with your bridesmaids, maid of honor, and close friends or family members who may be involved in planning or hosting the event. Their insights and input can help you make a decision that aligns with your desires while considering their abilities and availability.

Remember, there is no right or wrong choice. It’s about selecting the celebration that resonates most with your personality, preferences, and the dynamics of your relationships. You can also consider combining elements of both celebrations or having separate events if that aligns with your vision and circumstances.

wildflower wedding flowers

Having both a bridal shower and bachelorette

If you desire to have both a bridal shower and a bachelorette party, it is absolutely possible to plan and incorporate both celebrations into your pre-wedding festivities.

I would offer to host one yourself or at least have two different people be the host of each one. It is a big task to organize one event, let alone two.

Here’s how you can make it work:

  1. Communicate your wishes: Discuss your desire to have both celebrations with your bridesmaids, maid of honor, and close friends or family members involved in the planning process. Let them know that you would like to have both a bridal shower and a bachelorette party and explain your reasons for wanting both events.
  2. Determine the timing: Decide on the timing of each event. You can choose to have the bridal shower a few weeks or months before the wedding to allow for the traditional gift-giving and well wishes. The bachelorette party can take place closer to the wedding, such as a week or a few days before, to create a fun and memorable experience leading up to the big day.
  3. Delegate responsibilities: Assign specific responsibilities and tasks to different individuals involved in the planning process. This could include designating one person or group to organize the bridal shower and another person or group to handle the bachelorette party arrangements. Clearly communicate expectations, budget considerations, and any preferences you have for each event.
  4. Consider combining elements: While the two events have distinct purposes and atmospheres, you can still find ways to incorporate elements that overlap. For example, you could have some light-hearted games or activities at the bridal shower to add an element of fun, or you could have a moment during the bachelorette party where guests can offer advice or well wishes to you.
  5. Manage guest lists: Determine the guest lists for each event based on the purpose and dynamics of the celebrations. The bridal shower guest list can include a broader range of female friends and family members, while the bachelorette party guest list can consist of your closest friends and bridesmaids. However, there may be some overlap in the guest lists, so ensure proper communication to avoid any confusion.
  6. Plan logistics and budgets accordingly: Coordinate with the respective organizers to plan the logistics and budgets for each event separately. This will help ensure that the arrangements and finances are appropriately managed for each celebration.

Remember, the key is open communication and collaboration with those involved in the planning process. By expressing your desire for both a bridal shower and a bachelorette party and working together to make it happen, you can have the best of both worlds and create memorable experiences leading up to your wedding day.

white and terracotta table set up

A bridal shower is a pre-wedding celebration or party typically held for the bride to be before her wedding day. It is an opportunity for close friends and family members to come together and “shower” the bride with gifts, well wishes, and advice for her upcoming marriage.

Traditionally, the bridal shower is organized and hosted by the maid of honor or close female relatives of the bride. However, nowadays, anyone close to the bride, including family members, friends, or even colleagues, can take on the role of organizing and hosting the event.

white and sage green table set up

What happens at a bridal shower

During a bridal shower, guests often participate in various activities and games that are centered around the bride. These activities can include trivia games about the couple, guessing games, or other interactive activities that bring fun and laughter to the event.

Bridal showers are an opportunity for the bride and her loved ones to celebrate and share in the excitement leading up to the wedding day. They often feature decorations, food, and drinks. The specific format and theme of a bridal shower can vary depending on cultural traditions, personal preferences, and the overall style of the event.

Who pays for a bridal shower?

Traditionally, the maid of honor or the bridesmaids would cover the expenses for planning and hosting the bridal shower.

However, in recent times, financial responsibilities have become more flexible and can vary depending on various factors, including cultural norms, relationships, and the preferences of those involved.

How to plan a bridal shower

Discuss with the bride

Your first step should always be to talk to the bride. Ask her about her preferences, expectations, and any specific ideas she may have for the shower. Discuss the guest list, date, theme (if desired), and any particular activities or games she would like to include.

Set a budget

Determine the budget for the bridal shower. This will help you make decisions regarding the venue, decorations, food, and other elements of the event.

If you are the host and covering cost this is easier to decide. If you are all pitching in then make sure you speak to everyone and at least get a rough idea of budgets.

Choose a date and time

Coordinate with the bride and select a date and time that works for her and most of the important guests. Aim to schedule the shower a few weeks to a couple of months before the wedding, allowing ample time for preparations and RSVPs.

Create a guest list

Work with the bride to create a guest list based on her preferences. Consider inviting close friends, family members, and other individuals important to the bride’s life. Coordinate with the bride to collect the necessary contact information for the guests.

pressed flower cake with pressed flower treats on table

Select a venue

Determine the location for the bridal shower. It can be hosted at someone’s home, a rented event space, a restaurant, or any other suitable location based on the budget and the number of guests.

Choose a theme or style

If the bride desires a specific theme for the bridal shower, brainstorm ideas together and choose a theme that reflects her interests and personality. The theme can influence the decorations, invitations, and activities at the shower.

Choosing an overall style or theme is really important to have a cohesive event. It helps let guests know what to wear and expect and makes decorating and styling easier.

Send invitations

Create and send out invitations to the guests. You can choose to send traditional physical invitations or use digital platforms to send electronic invitations. Make sure to include the date, time, location, RSVP details, and any special instructions or requests.

A top tip is to set up a WhatsApp group for everyone or at least the key members so you can chat about any decisions easily.

feast of food lied out for a fancy buffet

Plan the menu

Decide if you want a sit-down meal, a buffet, or a more casual setup. Consider people’s dietary preferences and any potential food allergies or restrictions of the guests.

A bridal shower brunch is always a big hit. I love the pizza and prosecco theme, super easy to get pizzas and everyone likes pizza, right?

Organize activities and games

Plan some engaging activities and games for the guests to enjoy during the shower. This can include icebreaker games, trivia about the couple, advice-sharing sessions, or other interactive activities related to the bride or the wedding.

I have put together a list of ideas for games that people actually want to play!

Decorations and Styling

The fun part! Well, my favorite anyway!

Select decorations that will enhance the overall atmosphere of the event. This can include table centerpieces, balloons, banners, flowers, and any other decorative elements that align with the chosen theme or color scheme.

seed favors

Gifts and Favours

Discuss with the bride if she wants a gift registry or any specific instructions regarding gifts. Inform the guests about any gift preferences or suggestions in the invitations.

Consider what favors you will have for the guests attending. You can do small edible gifts or go all out with gift bags.

Plan the schedule

Create a detailed schedule for the bridal shower, including the timing of activities, gift opening, and any speeches or toasts. Make sure to allocate enough time for each segment while allowing room for flexibility and mingling.

Giving guests a brief timeline is helpful to things running smoothly. You can send this digitally, print if off or have it as a big sign.

Coordinate logistics

Take care of logistical aspects such as renting the venue, arranging for seating, audiovisual equipment (if needed), and ensuring any necessary permits or permissions are obtained.

This is when a planner comes in super useful. Having all the times, and supplier contact details in one place makes any event run smoothly.

Confirm RSVPs and finalize details

Keep track of guest RSVPs and communicate with the venue, vendors, and any individuals involved to confirm arrangements and finalize details.

If you have a big event with a large guest list I would have an online RSVP system if possible. If not keep a spreadsheet yourself that can be easily shared.

Execute the plan

On the day of the bridal shower, set up the venue according to the chosen theme and ensure everything is in place. Coordinate with any helpers or volunteers, greet the guests, and ensure the flow of the event follows the planned schedule.